The Fun Bunch Redskins Blog

Michael Vick's Career: Commentary By Triumph

I may be a little premature here, but I think Michael Vick's football career is pretty much over. One of his co-defendants,Tony Taylor of Hampton Virginia pleaded guilty, and will now be working for the federal prosecutors. It doesn't look good for Vick, which sucks because I'm from Virginia and used to be a huge Vick fan. He's pretty much screwed at this point. Here are the scenarios he has to face:

1. Plead Guilty: Falcons cut him, some desperate team picks him up. He is jeered and heckled wherever he goes.

2. Go to trial and have all of his dirty laundry aired out while missing an entire season. If he gets acquitted, he should be able to salvage something of a career. I doubt he would take the risk of going to trial.

3. Go to trial, and be convicted. Ouch, hello federal penitentiary.

Bill Walsh Dies: Legendary Coach Invented West Coast Offense

Sad news today for the entire NFL community. Legendary San Francisco 49ers coach Bill Walsh died today after a long bought with Leukemia. He was 75. Bill Walsh invented the West Coast offense and directed influenced much of the NFL coaching roster. Walsh also is credited with inventing or popularizing many of the modern basics of coaching, from the laminated sheets of plays held by coaches on almost every sideline, to the practice of scripting the first 15 offensive plays of a game. He will be greatly missed.

During his long battle with Leukemia, we were reminded of Bill Walsh through these hilarious Coors Light commercials.

LaRon Landry Redskins Training Camp Holdout Ends

FINALLY! The Number 6 overall pick in the NFL draft, LaRon Landry finally signed his massive contract. He will now actually start practicing with the rest of the Redskins. His contract? Five years with a maximum value of $41.5 million and $17.5 million in guarantees. Not too shabby. He'll be visiting Ronnie Mervis in the very near future. This kid has got some serious talent. If LaRon and Sean Taylor click, the Redskins defense will be looking good this year. Check out these LaRon Landry highlights from his LSU days.

UPDATE: The Washington Post is reporting that he will likely be the starter all year long. Stud.

Joe Gibbs Likes Tony Stewart Better than The Redskins

Is anybody else at all concerned with the fact that Joe Gibbs is currently running two professional sports franchises at the same time? I'm being generous by calling NASCAR a sport. Seriously though, how can he not be distracted from the Redskins when he has all kinds of crap to deal with at Joe Gibbs Racing? To be a successful coach in the NFL, you need to devote 100% of your time and attention to coaching the football team. Besides the fact that NASCAR totally sucks, it taking attention away from the matter at hand: Winning the NFC East and making the playoffs. I'm giving Joe Gibbs one more season. If we don't have a good year, he needs to either quit NASCAR or quit the Redskins.

I heard that Bill Cowher is looking for a job in 2008... I want to know your thoughts. What's Joe thinking? What's Danny-boy Snyder thinking? Leave some comments.

NFC East Training Camp Report Part 1: Dallas Cowboys Predictions

Since The Fun Bunch Blog launched, we've proudly posted about actual, real-live 2007 NFL football a grand total of zero times. Might as well get started now, and we'll start with the Dallas Cowboys.

The Dallas Cowboys 2006 effort can be distilled down to one glorious moment. When Tony Romo flubbed that snap hold, I was in a crowded sports bar in Austin, Texas surrounded by 500 crappy cowboys fans. As Tony Romo was tackled at the end of the play, I instinctively stood up on my chair and started cheering. Bad idea. I was lucky to get out of there in one piece. Anyways, on with my predictions:

Prediction 1: With The Big Tuna gone I don't see Dallas being any better than last season's 9-7. Wade Phillips is not a coaching juggernaut, with a 48 - 39 career head coaching record. HOWEVER... Have you seen Wade Phillips' daughter? Seriously, that's his daughter, Tracy Phillips. Look her up. Their schedule isn't a cake-walk, either. The finish out their season with two road games, @ Carolina, and @ The Skins. They also get Chicago @ Chicago, and the Pats at home.

Prediction 2: Terrell Owens will become a total train wreck once again. I don't see Wade being the strict disciplinarian that The Tuna was. Give Terrell a couple of weeks, and watch the fireworks fly between him a Romo. Romo is not all that good. Defenses will have him dialed in relatively quickly. And when that happens, T.O freaks out. Also, why is Terrell Owens having an, all-male pool orgy with Steve Nash, Matt Leinart, and some other guy? Freaky.

Redskins Cheerleader of the Week: Jenny

I came to a great realization today: There are more Redskins Cheerleaders than there are weeks between now and the Super Bowl. So, that means the Redskins Cheerleader of the Week segment will happen more than once every 7 days. I didn't think you'd mind. Jenny is a rookie on the squad. She's a local girl, raised in Burke VA. Fairfax County represent! See all of Jenny's pictures after the jump!

The Greaseman and Glenn Brenner: '80s-Style

Much of my childhood was spent trying to decipher the sexual innuendo contained in The Greasman Show on DC101. It was usually my big brother that translated the terms "Schnarlin'", "Squeal Like a Pig", and "Hobbling". During football season, Grease was always fired up about the Skins, often interviewing the likes of John Riggins. Good times... If you lived in the DC in the '80s, you definitely knew who Glenn Brenner was, too (pictured with Grease). He was the greatest DC broadcaster ever, bar none. The man is a sportscasting legend that everybody loved. The best thing about Channel 9. Tragically, he died of a brain tumor in 1991. During the glory days of the Redskins, these two personalities were my only source of Redskins news and hype, and I loved it. Now, who do we got? Elliott in the Morning? I don't think so.

BREAKING NEWS: Tony Stewart Fired from Joe Gibbs Racing Team

Made you look. God, this time of year sucks. There's no football on and baseball is embarassingly boring. To make matters worse, Rednecks get to rejoice in the height of the NASCAR season, swilling Keystone Light and rocking out to Toby Keith. I'm still trying to figure out this whole NASCAR thing, although I did see Ricky Bobby last year, so I guess I'm somewhat of a NASCAR expert at this point. If Ricky Bobby were real, he would be on the Joe Gibbs Team, behind the wheel of the #20 Home Depot car.

An In-Depth Demographic Study of the Typical NASCAR Fan

Ronnie Mervis: King of Redskins Tacky Bling

If you live in D.C, you know who Ronnie Mervis is. You've heard his fake, overwrought South African accent on the radio proclaiming "This is Ronnie Mervis. I have traveled through the darkest of Africa to bring quality diamonds to Tyson's Corner..." Basically, the guy sucks. And, he sucks on many levels. For starters, never buy any jewelry from Mervis Diamond Importers. I went in there to shop for a diamond, and they were so obviously trying to rip me off, it wasn't even funny. Think used-car dealership and you'll understand what I mean. Anyways, turns out this guy is outfitting the Redskins with mad, tacky bling. Santana Moss and Clinton Portis are guilty of wearing ugly-ass jewelry from Ronnie Mervis. I have photographic evidence to prove it. BTW, if you actually need a diamond, go to The Tiny Jewel Box. They are classy, honest and actually sell high quality jewelry. Do you think he actually goes down into the diamond mines and finds the diamonds? Every diamond sold in the USA goes through the same merchants and markets overseas. Ronnie does not mine diamonds. Check out this radio commercial of his.

More pictures after the jump...

Lindsay Lohan vs. Michael Vick:Who'll Spend More Time in the Slammer?

I promise this blog won't devolve into a TMZ.com clone but, it's a little slow on the Redskins news front in July... Who is in deeper shit these days, Lindsay "Li-Lo" Lohan or Michael Vick? Lindsay was arrested AGAIN last night for DUI and possession of cocaine. Michael Vick has been indicted on Federal charges related to an alleged dog fighting ring at his house in Smithfield, Virginia. He was also banned from training camp. If I were a betting man, I'd say Li-Lo will spend more time in jail, but Michael Vick is in more shit, just because of the sheer amount of money he stands to lose in contracts and endorsements. Lindsay can probably make enough money off Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen royalties to keep herself nostril-deep in blow for the next 20 years. Does anybody else think that Li-Lo's life will follow the same trajectory as Dana Plato?